Last week was my second time travelling for work since I came back from maternity leave. The first time, I was away for 2 nights and frankly, sort of looked forward to the break from mommy-duties. This time, I was away for nearly a week and in another country. The trip came right after our extended trip to California, so I didn't feel mentally or emotionally prepared. I also just spent 12 straight days with Logan (which, aside from the 1st day, were glorious), which was the longest time I ever spent with Logan since maternity leave. I admit that I liked it...a lot. Logan's toddler months are more tiring but definitely more fun than his newborn months when I was home with him.
So, when Monday morning arrived, I couldn't help but tear up as I picked Logan up from his crib. I was so used to being with him all day/night from vacation, and now I wouldn't be able to see him for 5 nights. How was I going to get through the week??
I was very unhappy to leave that day, but this is what made the trip a little more bearable:
1. Business class. Unlimited booze, movies and ice cream sundaes can definitely ease the mental stress.
2. Non-stop work. I was 6 hours ahead of US Eastern, so I ended up working "double-shifts" each day. I would just keep myself occupied all day and night to max out my productivity. After dinner, I'd keep working in my hotel room, but this was when I got a chance to...
3. FaceTime. Seriously, what did travelling parents do before FaceTime?? Thank you, Steve Jobs.
I spoke with a few working dads on my team about how they deal with the time away from home. Most of them consider the travel to be a nice break from the kids (but they still miss their kids). They call, FaceTime or Skype every night or when they can after business activities are over. One dad told me that he once he's home for 3 weeks, he's typically itching to travel again and get out of the house because he needs a "break" from the kids and stuff going on at home. While I was a little surprised to hear that, I sort of empathized. Travelling for work can be pretty posh. You are able to regain and enjoy a part of your pre-parent self, such as adult and intellectually challenging conversations over late-night drinks, or indulge in (free) extravagant business dinners, or catch up on movies on the plane-- the non-cartoon/PG13 ones that you're forced to watch with the kids. You have time to get up in the morning and work out because you don't need to worry about waking/feeding/dressing the kids and rushing them out the door.
These men have stay-at-home wives ("SAHW"), so they don't always feel guilty about leaving their kids alone with their wives for a few days-- this is what the SAHW signed up for. I felt guilty leaving Logan with the husband and mother-in-law all week (though the husband's office was closed all week due to the hurricane, so it kind of worked out). But in the end, everything worked out. Logan welcomed me with a big happy hug...which made me cry again.
How do you working/travelling parents deal with the separation from your kids?
Hi.. i don't have kids. but this post was awesome.
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